Disgusting

Skullplay

Could I

collect up the

remnants of

perhaps

a few scattered

and empty shells

of animal

existance and

by sheer and

frightnening luck

have some rope or string

either will do

nearby?

But why

but why

you’d like to know?

Here’s why.

I would

with the string,

attach each skull I discover

on my short treks out

into the

cold

and

frosty winterness

maybe a hare’s skull

complete with teeth

or a crow’s beak

with plucked feather

still stuck to the carrion?

into a long

and stony

bony

rope.

With each interval of

admittedly rotting

bone, it would feel marvelous

absolutely

to have them concealed for a time

not too long

just enough so don’t become…

uncomfortable

up inside myself.

Each skull

scratching away with its

rotting canine teeth or

even

a beak?

at my colon. But don’t

make too much

fuss. After all

they’ll be tugged out after a little while.

To bring me to ecstasy.

As if at pistol-point.

And I’ll shriek my way through hell and back.

With the blood and the leaking.

And the bodily cursing.

As my eyes water.

As my lungs contract.

As my stomach turns over.

And I pull them out.

Each skull

readily

ruined but

completely

fulfilled in its

their

job.

And next time

when I’m more

aware

of my ablutions

I’ll keep the child-skulls.

I’ll keep them.

Clean.

Gather more rope.

And enjoy myself

once more

just entirely once more

despite the blood

they have less teeth

again.

II: Suicide Room

I: Suicide Room

 

A series of memorable cases from the Suicide Room. All information included in these documents is shown only for the purpose of exposing the weakness of the human mind. Together, with the right technology and purpose, we can overcome these weaknesses and create barriers to stop the impulses taking over. Together, we can create superhumans, immune to persuasion, obedience and oppression. But we can only do this with subjects willing to submit themselves to the Suicide Room. Through failure we will succeed. Through death we will live. Through the weakness of others we will strengthen ourselves.

–Case File B13, Subject 0013–
–Pressuriser:
0223, Female, Experienced
–ATTENTION:
Case File 0013 for Subject 0013 became corrupted. Physical information was lost, data was removed and documented accounts became encrypted. As no one has any leads on how this occurred, all copies and traces of Case File 0013 have been destroyed. This is a back-up case, written only in brief. It is named Case File B13, about Subject 0013.
–Status: Completed – Failure – Prolonged suffering through self-inflicted pain, similar to the Chinese execution method of Lingchi.
–Case eligible for public viewing. All information contained within this document has been recorded for the purposes of scientific curiosity and for the sake of furthering the human race. All information was briefly logged from physiological, audio and visual aids, plus the memory of Pressuriser 0223. In this particular case, the memory of Pressuriser 0223 is extremely valuable.

–Open Recreated Case–

Pre-Case Notes: The B13 file has also faced problems with corruption, though most information is still salvageable. Any scientific merit has been destroyed either as a result of the corruption or our own destruction of the original files. Therefore, this case is merely kept as a record, rather than as a means of furthering knowledge of the human condition.

Subject 0013 seemed to have no reasons for applying for the Suicide Room experimental process. Given his family and personal history, there seemed to be no trigger for his desire to enter a room where he would most likely be manipulated into suicide. However, his application was successful and he was welcomed into the Suicide Room.

He was leaving behind two teenage twins, one boy and one girl, who were entering their third year of secondary school. He was also leaving behind a partner, a fiancée, whom he was to get married to in November. As for his history, medical records indicated no type of depression in the past. Researchers concluded, though, that he could be more valuable than any other subject; someone with seemingly no reason to die could surely walk out of the Suicide Room just as easily as they had walked in. Therefore, all were anxious to understand and learn from his physiological processes in either the succumbing to or the overcoming of suicidal thoughts.

Once in the Suicide Room, with Pressuriser 0223, he asked to be humiliated and belittled verbally by her. The destruction of the ego is an important part of the jump to suicide, and it was recorded that he had asked the pressuriser to perform this. It was also recorded as a possible sexual fetish, such as masochism, though EEG scans failed to find any kind of reaction to his humiliation to verify this.

Pressuriser 0223 began as she usually did. She began talking to him, building up her words from casual conversation to subtle insult, just as the subject had asked. He picked up on it straight away, and his behaviour changed. He stood up from the table and moved to one wall, out of the way of the light.

Pressuriser 0223 recalls his facial expressions during the process of humiliation. He refused to look at her, instead turning his head away. She still continued to build up her insults. Only after he had been standing at the wall for five minutes did she get up and move towards him. She recalls how she eventually stood right in front of him, sneering offence into his face, and his expression was one of pain and concentration as he looked to the side. She made every effort to get in front of him, to stare him down to add force to her insults, but he never held her gaze for more than a second.

After thirty-five minutes of insults, Subject 0013 moved away from the pressuriser, pushing past her and retreating to the corner of the room where he crouched, staring into the corner. Pressuriser 0223 recalls how his body shook despite his defensive position. She says she has never seen such a controlled, but chaotic reaction from a subject.

Pressuriser 0223 returned to her seat at the wooden table, becoming silent. Then she set about using another tactic. It is rather juvenile, but often succeeds in either irritating and therefore panicking the subjects, or even establishing a balance of power. She began to tap one finger on the tabletop to the beat of a second, all the while staring at the subject. She continued to do this until she got a reaction.

Subject 0013 stood and turned, revealing to the camera the marks he had inflicted on himself. Clumsy chicken-scratchings covered his arms, and skin was embedded under his nails. His expression was one of hatred, directed at the pressuriser. Of course, she remained unfazed and looked at him as he looked at her. He asked for his final wish. His final decision.

His chosen method of suicide on his file was marked as unknown. This meant that the room had not been prepared for his decision. There was nothing in the room apart from the table and the chairs. However, it is not uncommon for subjects to want to change their methods. In this case, they get to use their ‘final wish’, just as 0013 did, to choose his method.

He asked for a sharp knife, though would not provide the pressuriser with his actual plan. This was relayed to the researchers who provided the knife quickly, not wanting to break the spell of the room.

Pressuriser 0223 recalls the next part, Subject 0013’s suicide, graphically. Most information from other sources, such as heart-rate, blood pressure and EEG results were corrupted after the process, most of them at the point of his decision. Therefore, only Pressuriser 0223’s memory, as well as the log from the uncorrupted video of the cameras, will be used to recreate the scene.

He returned to his seat, opposite Pressuriser 0223, who, by her own admission, stopped tapping and began to insult him again. Her offending comments were moderate, and could easily be brushed off by someone in the right mind. However, Pressuriser 0223 is experienced and knows when a subject is not, and never will be, in the right mind. She does not resort to tactics she does not have to use; “never play an ace when a two will do.”

Subject 0013 placed the blade of the knife to his arm and began to inflict several shallow cuts. With each, he barely flinched. Pressuriser 0223 theorises the first ones were a test. She recalls she expected him to next draw the point of the knife up the inside his arm, severing arteries and causing death through blood loss. She was ultimately wrong.

She recalls him never meeting her eye, never acknowledging her presence in front of him. Instead, his attention remained on his arm. With the knife in his left hand, he began to slice deeper into his flesh. He levered the knife under the living flesh, pulling it and slicing it away from his own body, the whole time attempting not to scream. He failed this very soon and, for the next twenty minutes, Pressuriser 0223 was within an echo-chamber of noise. The flesh he had severed was not a huge chunk, but the wound in his upper arm was seeping blood, flowing down to his elbow and onto the arm of the chair, before it overflowed onto the floor. Subject 0013 stabbed his nails into his thigh, the muscle of the right arm beating and pulsing blood from its severed self.

The pain was not over though. With cries and curses, Subject 0013 removed his trousers,and turned the knife on his calf. Pressuriser 0223 had since returned to sitting silently. She watched his every move, eyes cold. Her morbid curiosity was unquenchable at this point.

The wound the subject inflicted on his leg stained almost his entire foot red. He pushed the knife in, though, in the process, his hand slipped on the handle, slippery with his own blood and he stumbled, opening up the side of his leg too. The wound was bigger than he had intended, and suddenly his voice was all the pressuriser could hear. “Red, raw, animalistic, music born through pain.”

Pressuriser 0223 moved around to the side of the table to keep an eye on the subject, who was holding his leg. She leaned against the table to see him scattering blood as he reached again for the knife. In her eyes, he was inflicting pain on himself to save himself from the pain he was experiencing. This is a common reason for self-inflicted wounds anyway, though usually they are to counteract emotional pain. If Subject 0013 was following that idea, his emotional pain, the pressuriser says, must have been “nothing less than horrific”.

He made his final attempt to bleed. He pushed against his side, just below the ribs, though the blade did not get in deep. He had no strength to get it in deeper. Blood loss had sapped his strength, and the adrenaline from the first few cuts had run out. He lay gasping, saying no words, offering no pleads or cries of regret. His leg, stained and glistening, lay contorted behind him. From his side, the knife lay still, dark liquid and loosened gristle around it. The subject’s hands, clenched, eventually slackened. His pale skin, almost grey with stress, seemed crinkled. His lips were dry and breath came slowly.

Pressuriser 0223 stood still. She watched him. She says her own senses were heightened by the prospect of his death. The colours and sounds she experienced as he died are still clear to her. She remembers how, with his last breath, his chest fell and his shoulders slackened. His eyelids twitched but did not shut. Some of his eyelashes were joined with sweat.

Usually the researchers are called in after ten minutes after the subject’s supposed death. This time, though, Pressuriser 0223 requested an extra ten minutes. During that twenty minutes of silence in that room, all she did was move her chair so she could sit facing him, her elbows on her knees. She did not move much through that time, just sat and watched his corpse.

The researchers entered after the twenty minutes was over and were hasty in declaring him dead. Pressuriser 0223 left the room after rearranging the chairs, and the researchers were left with the corpse. Pressuriser 0223 reported the whole process “surreal”.

 

–End Results: Subject 0013 failed in our expectations of him to leave the Suicide Room alive. His threshold was surprisingly low, needing only Pressuriser 0223’s insults to drive him to make his final decision. His Suicide Room process will only serve as records, though it has remained a case permanently cemented in Pressuriser 0223’s memory.

 

III: Suicide Room

I: Mistake [Working Title]

I really feel I reached my peak with Hello so this is more of an attempt to claw back something I really loved, because he disappeared from every aspect of my creative mind when Hello ended and I feel depressed when I think of him.

I have no idea if this story will continue, but it may do if people like it. I really need to find something I’m as passionate about as Hello, but it’s been months and I doubt I ever will.

 

Mistake page 1

LongManPigMan Concept Art

I could do something with this.
If I can stand to look at it for more than a two seconds without my brain screaming, anyway.

ForestLongManPigMan

I know what its feet look like.
That means that I know what its footprints look like.

So I can tell if it’s following me.

Oh Yestin. Stick close behind me.
Have your hand on my hip and save me.
My hideous guardian angel.
Save me from the Long Man.

II: Hello

I: Hello

 

Hello P4Hello P5

 

If you have the time, or the energy, or enough power on your electronic device, help me out? I’ve got a few things I want to know and I need other people’s eyes for that.
How does my character come across in this part? Assuming you’ve read I: Hello? (Do you feel for/like/dislike them and why?)
Has your view or judgement changed? (Do you like them more or less, what did you feel about the character? Do you have an image of the character in your head?)
Do you want to read more or are you quite content to stop here?
Thank you for letting me use your eyes.

III: Hello  IV: Hello  V: Hello  VI: Hello  VII: Hello